Christmas..

Haha.. As I have expected. Many of us posted about Christmas.. Now it's mu turn :) To be honest, I did not really realise Christmas went by. It did not feel like Christmas to me too actually. I was so busy with so many things.

First, on Christmas eve it was such a rush to get from the place I work to church cause work finished at 5.30 and caroling started at 6.30.. But God gave me a smooth journey and I reached the STATION on time :) I enjoyed caroling but then, it just wasn't there, the thought of Christmas(I do not like to use the word mood, though I want to). Such a tiring Christmas eve. I only shower at 1.30 in the morning. Hehe..

Hah.. Christmas morning.. The night before slept at 2 in the morning and woke up at 7.15 a.m. As you can imagine how tired I was.. But still could hold it in. The worship team started practicing so as the violin girls and boys and other instrumentalist. I was sitting there thinking that I would not have to do much this Christmas cause am not in the worship team and all. But I came to realise there wasn't anyone that is gonna prepare the stage for the transection of every event. So again, got myself busy with planing and delegating tasks. Almost through whole service I had to move around. Story cut short, we finished everything around 6 after Uncle Jacky's visitation. Was so tired by then. At night when out for dinner with mum and sisters.

Here was where Christmas finally sunk into me.. Was driving through town looking for a place to eat, I told my sis, what a great thing it is to recieve a gift during Christmas. You get two in one, the gift of baby Jesus Christ that is already everything that you can ask for, yet another gift as something more. What greater gift is there that a man can ask for than salvation given to Him, yet with God's grace He still bless us all the other things around us like our family, friends, love, etc. A present will not mean anything to me if why it is given wasn't from a greater meaning. My Christmas presents were with great value cause it came from a greater meaning. I was telling my sister, to me, though the present maybe just 1 ringgit, but in my heart it valued a 100. The night ended with dinner near Sunway till close to 12 midnight. It was a good, satisfiying and happy meal :) Another blessing.

Thank you to those have bought me present, I really appreciate it. To those who did not, to me you guys are the gift from God to me already, and it is enough. Today was a day where I absorbed everything in what had happened yesterday, and I am just overwhelmed and in awe of How graceful is my King and MY Father...

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Is She/He The Right One?

Another very subjective issue that many of us struggle to answer. I am not here to solve this problem but to suggest ways to look about it. These few months I have been hearing a lot of the sentence ‘No one wants break ups. When I agreed to enter this relationship was cause I thought it would have worked out, but it didn’t.’(something like that). So, how do we know who is the right person?

First, I definitely have to say I am totally against ‘trying’ out mates to decide and to know or rather to figure out is this person your type or what so ever. There’s also no such thing as you need ‘experience’ to me. It doesn’t make sense, how come you need experience for your second girlfriend or boyfriend but not the first one? So experience and trying out is a big NO NO in figuring out who will be the right one for you. I also believe that whatever you purposely do wrong and go against now in a relationships, the consequences you will hafta pay later.

So then, again, how do we find the ‘right’ one? Let’s use the simplest example that we all know, Adam and Eve. Did they have a choice who they wanted to marry? No, cause there were no one else but only the both of them. I believe same applies to us. I know you may say that there’re different and we are different. But if you think about it, where are the differences? In the end, there’s only one lady and one man, and God. So what difference does it make with us?

What I am trying to reach to you guys is, you will never know who the ‘right’ one will be or figure out whether that person is the right one or not cause only when the time comes, you will know it. Do not waste time trying to figure out is she or he the one for you? Or are you gonna marry him or her? Don’t bother cause you will not find out till the time comes. Don’t hafta go ‘hunting’. You can’t do anything more or anything less to change who are you gonna be marrying next time. So wait.

At the mean time, prepare yourself spiritually, mentally to accept someone else into your life like some of the things I wrote in the previous post. However, even after knowing this there are many other questions that will lead out of this. For example, how do I know that the time has come and that is the person that I should be pursuing? If a person would to ask me this question now, there’s only one thing I would ask them do, is to suggest that the person would put his or her feelings to the test and to know how true the feelings are and not just temporary emotions. Cause I have learned that emotions can be really deceiving. About how long, it’s very subjective and it depends on the person. For me I would suggest at least a year, but the longer I believe the better. And all this I think should be done even before anything has started like hints or lots of smses and stuff. If your are really meant to be I think that there’s nothing to be afraid about cause the other person won’t run anywhere if it is God’s will, so I think there is nothing to rush. After however long you think that the feelings are stable and after lots of prayers only I think a person should start pursuing a relationship. But everything has to be done in a proper and right manner and pleasing in God’s eyes.

I want to make it clear here that when I write this post and the previous one, 'Am I Ready To Date' post, I am not trying initiate anything here or do not ever think that this are post that you can take ‘tips’ to lead to a faster relationship – as if it is even good enough to have tips taken from. But this post is to tell you teenagers these days that your life does not all surround around this tiny little issue of girl boy relationship and in the are of this boy girl relationship thing we've set the bar too low and expect too little from the opposite sex and our selves because of our sinful desires. There are many other more important things that are happening out there and also to remind you all that God’s will should always come first in our life, not ours. Do ponder of what I have given thoughts on cause I think that many of us share the same problem and I understand what you guys are going through as I am a teenager myself.

The last thing that I wanna warn you folks out there that this boy girls relationship thing may seem very easy and light to many of you cause it's as easy as, 'yeah I wanna be your partner', but the outcome is serious. I am not joking when I say it is serious. I wanna end this post by urging all of you out there to rather pursue a life pleasing to our Father in Heaven and seek the treasure that last forever then just spending hours of your life wasted thinking about all this tiny little issue.

1 Corinthians 10:13
No temptation has seized except what is common to man. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

1 Corinthians 9:20-22
To the Jews I become like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I become like one under the law(though I myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law. To those not having the law I become like one not having the law(though I am not free from God’s law but am under Christ’ law), so as to win those not having the law. To the weak I become the weak to win the weak. I have become all things to all man so that by all possible means I might save some.

From what I understand in the passage above is that in any circumstances we become it to understand someone that we may in any possible means save that person. I believe the passage is saying, how can we save someone if we do not understand them? It’s as if we’re speaking Bahasa Melayu to an American. How will he or she understand unless we speak in their language or interpret what are we saying?

I hope that I understood and explained that passage correctly but there is a confusion that occurred as I read that passage. Is the passage trying to say that if I wanted to reach out to a smoker, I have to be a smoker? If I wanted to save a rebellion I have to be one too? I kinda knew that wasn’t what the passage was trying to reach to me, but I couldn’t prove or explain why that isn’t what it is trying to say to me. By God’s grace and wisdom that He has given me, I finally got my answer as I was doing my devotion the other say, and it is found in 1 Corinthians 10:31 and 32 –
So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks or the church of God – even as I try to please everybody in every way. For I am not seeking my own good but the good of many, so that they may be saved.

It make sense doesn’t it? And I think it totally answers my question. In whatever I do, I do it for the glory of God. If I were to reach out to a smoker, by reaching out I am doing it for His glory and at the same time, I do not be a smoker when I am trying to reach out to a smoker cause it does not give glory to Him if I smoke too.

Secondly, in whatever I do I must not cause anyone around me to stumble whether my family in Christ or not. If my actions do cause any of my family in Christ to stumble, I should rather not do anything to cause the member of the body to stumble in his or her faith. If a unsaved person sees what is done and is something that would cause him or her to stumble even further from believing that Jesus Christ is the one and only Savior, I should just leave and not do anything more to cause that person to stumble even further. Though as Christians our purpose is to serve others and please others in whatever way we can so that we may bring them to the knowledge of Christ, we should always be aware not to be a stumbling block to another and in whatever we do. There should be nothing but one motif that is for the glory of God.

Friday, December 12, 2008

Am I Ready to Date?

Haha. I can’t believe I am actually writing part of this post DURING my SPM ‘season’. But this issue kinda bothers me and I feel like I just need to get it out my mind, for now. Well I know this topic has been a hot topic ever since the word ‘dating’ existed. I know that I am one that has no place to talk about this issue compared to so many wiser people out there, but just thought that maybe sharing my thoughts may help one or two to look into this issue in a more deeper manner than they are now.

I have to start talking about this from the age factor. How many times people have attempted to set an age for dating, but from my view, it never works, cause to me, there is no age limit for dating. However, I definitely believe there are criteria that you have to reach before you think you can date. To me, your purpose in life plays a big role. First you need to have a proper and clear purpose in life that you know before you can accept someone else into your life. Your purpose of life have to be worth living for, worth fighting for, worth dying for. And if your purpose in life is just to look for a spouse then you are definitely not ready to be in a relationship.

Secondly, are you capable of supporting your own life spiritually, financially, mentally and manage your life in the most basic manner? – able to carry out daily routine without taking short cuts(I can’t think of any other ways to explain it). I believe that your relationship with God must first be set right and stable and that you are able to sustain it in a daily basis of devotions, prayers, praising and worshiping Him in your personal walk and studying The Word and always trying to grow deeper in your relationship with Him. Financially capable to support yourself, mentally capable, organized, have a purpose other than just seeking for a spouse, and mature(would depend on your maturity to determine your own maturity).

Third is, you must be able to live without a women or man. You cannot be desperate and dependable to someone else, except God, I believe. The moment you feel dependable to someone, it’s a sign that you are not ready to for a relationship. And that will fall back to the first criteria about your purpose in life and how much you stand firm to it. If you are firm in your purpose in life and fixed your eyes and mind on the reward that lies ahead, you will not be swayed away. A good example would be me. I used to be afraid to be single, or I’d prefer to call it alone. There was one part of my life that I was constantly seeking for a partner to feel secure of myself, not to feel lonely, and that is a obvious sign of immaturity in starting a relationship.

One thing that I have been thinking, and it has been driving me crazy since is the very reason WHY do I pursue a girl? Is it for my own selfish desire? That is the answer I am still searching for even till now. Why do I message her? Is it to make myself feel good and fill the void in me? Why do I talk to her? To pursue my OWN feeling so I may feel good? Feel pleasured? Why do I hold her hands? So I may feel loved? So my human desires are fulfilled? It sounds silly when I say it’s selfish, but wait till you try to look at how do you actually affect the other party. Whatever you do or say, have you ever wondered how will it affect the other party? Well you may be able to control your own emotions and feelings, thinking that there is nothing happening and you may have felt good after those conversations, but what happens to her/him? Leaving the feelings to grow deeper for the other party is not a very responsible act I would say. He/she will be left ‘stranded’ after all the talks and sms-es you had and wondering where would this lead to? Or what to do next? . All you care is that you have felt good, you have filled that void for now and you don’t care about the consequences. To me that is just selfish.

So then, how do you handle this situation? Before I say anything, I just want to remind you that these are merely my thoughts and it may not necessary be right. This is based on my own level of maturity and thinking. I think that your motives of doing anything to pursue a relationship is to seek more for the other party’s benefit. By saying this you have to eliminate so many actions that I mention above. I know this sounds pretty impossible to live up to, and I do not know if I could even come close to these criteria, but I think this should be the standard we set.

I don't think it is easy to, but it's definitely worth it. I believe that the higher standard that you set for yourself personally in your own life by the way you keep yourself blameless in God’s sight, by the values you live by, the stands you make, God will also reveal to you the person that is to that level of yours. I do not mean standard here as in you set yourself to ‘get’ a handsome or pretty girl then you will get a pretty girl or anything, but its the second criteria that I mentioned above.

Love is patient,
Love is kind.
It does not boast,
It is not proud.
It is not rude,
it is not self seeking,
it is not easily angered,
it keeps no record of wrong.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects,
always trust,
always hopes,
always perseveres.
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

The next post or a few post later I may wanna write about how is it to determine which is the one for you and how to know that that man or lady is the one that God has set for you and that is the right one.

I do hope that we youths these days would set higher standards for ourselves in our lives and not just think just because we are youths we can do whatever we want cause these are the years that we can do so, but to know that whatever you do now, you are setting the consequences ahead of you. Whatever you do, think, say, set, live by and initiate is what that is gonna form you next time, so be wise to take every step. I have learned that emotions should always come second. If whatever we do are based on our emotions, disaster awaits you 

Wednesday, December 10, 2008