Is She/He The Right One?

Another very subjective issue that many of us struggle to answer. I am not here to solve this problem but to suggest ways to look about it. These few months I have been hearing a lot of the sentence ‘No one wants break ups. When I agreed to enter this relationship was cause I thought it would have worked out, but it didn’t.’(something like that). So, how do we know who is the right person?

First, I definitely have to say I am totally against ‘trying’ out mates to decide and to know or rather to figure out is this person your type or what so ever. There’s also no such thing as you need ‘experience’ to me. It doesn’t make sense, how come you need experience for your second girlfriend or boyfriend but not the first one? So experience and trying out is a big NO NO in figuring out who will be the right one for you. I also believe that whatever you purposely do wrong and go against now in a relationships, the consequences you will hafta pay later.

So then, again, how do we find the ‘right’ one? Let’s use the simplest example that we all know, Adam and Eve. Did they have a choice who they wanted to marry? No, cause there were no one else but only the both of them. I believe same applies to us. I know you may say that there’re different and we are different. But if you think about it, where are the differences? In the end, there’s only one lady and one man, and God. So what difference does it make with us?

What I am trying to reach to you guys is, you will never know who the ‘right’ one will be or figure out whether that person is the right one or not cause only when the time comes, you will know it. Do not waste time trying to figure out is she or he the one for you? Or are you gonna marry him or her? Don’t bother cause you will not find out till the time comes. Don’t hafta go ‘hunting’. You can’t do anything more or anything less to change who are you gonna be marrying next time. So wait.

At the mean time, prepare yourself spiritually, mentally to accept someone else into your life like some of the things I wrote in the previous post. However, even after knowing this there are many other questions that will lead out of this. For example, how do I know that the time has come and that is the person that I should be pursuing? If a person would to ask me this question now, there’s only one thing I would ask them do, is to suggest that the person would put his or her feelings to the test and to know how true the feelings are and not just temporary emotions. Cause I have learned that emotions can be really deceiving. About how long, it’s very subjective and it depends on the person. For me I would suggest at least a year, but the longer I believe the better. And all this I think should be done even before anything has started like hints or lots of smses and stuff. If your are really meant to be I think that there’s nothing to be afraid about cause the other person won’t run anywhere if it is God’s will, so I think there is nothing to rush. After however long you think that the feelings are stable and after lots of prayers only I think a person should start pursuing a relationship. But everything has to be done in a proper and right manner and pleasing in God’s eyes.

I want to make it clear here that when I write this post and the previous one, 'Am I Ready To Date' post, I am not trying initiate anything here or do not ever think that this are post that you can take ‘tips’ to lead to a faster relationship – as if it is even good enough to have tips taken from. But this post is to tell you teenagers these days that your life does not all surround around this tiny little issue of girl boy relationship and in the are of this boy girl relationship thing we've set the bar too low and expect too little from the opposite sex and our selves because of our sinful desires. There are many other more important things that are happening out there and also to remind you all that God’s will should always come first in our life, not ours. Do ponder of what I have given thoughts on cause I think that many of us share the same problem and I understand what you guys are going through as I am a teenager myself.

The last thing that I wanna warn you folks out there that this boy girls relationship thing may seem very easy and light to many of you cause it's as easy as, 'yeah I wanna be your partner', but the outcome is serious. I am not joking when I say it is serious. I wanna end this post by urging all of you out there to rather pursue a life pleasing to our Father in Heaven and seek the treasure that last forever then just spending hours of your life wasted thinking about all this tiny little issue.

1 Corinthians 10:13
No temptation has seized except what is common to man. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008